IGHSAU relinquishes control of high school girls hair styles

Turns out, the IGHSAU is not as completely worthless as I originally had it pegged.

In reading the 2009 Volleyball Preseason Memo on the website Monday, I was delighted to read one of the rule adaptations for the upcoming season.

"We will now be adhering to the National Federation Rules regarding hair devices and adornments. (Rule 4-1-5) Hair devices made of soft material may be worn to control the hair. Hair adornment made of soft material and no more than two inches wide may be worn. Please note there is no mention of color specifications. The IGHSAU has eliminated the adaptation that mandated colors."

Finally!

The union has realized the stupidity of requiring girls to wear matching headbands and the fact that the color of the pre-wrap, sweatband or hair tie does not have any sort of effect on the play of the game.

For those of you who do not stay informed on the latest hairstyle rules imparted by the IGHSAU, here is the rule as printed in the 2008-09 basketball preseason memo:

"A headband is now defined as any item that goes around the entire head. If worn, only one is permitted and must be worn on the forehead/crown of the head. It must be unadorned and a maximum of two inches wide. It may be white, black, beige or a single solid color similar to the torso of the jersey and must be the same color for all teammates. This would include a cloth headband, elastic shoestring, pre-wrap, etc. The rule for hair devices used to control the hair that do not go around the head has not changed. Ribbons, rubber bands, scrunchies, etc. can still be worn. They must be SOFT and unadorned but may be any color and do not have to be the same for all teammates."

First of all, I'd like to point out that it is completely ridiculous that the powers that be deem it necessary to waste time specifying such detailed rules concerning the hairstyles of high school girls.

Notice, there has never been a rule concerning the coloring of the hair, or Jenessa Schutte, a volleyball alum from Western Christian in Hull, would have received far less attention during her tenure with the Wolfpack.

Secondly, why did the union decide that headbands were the only hair accessory required to match?

It specifically takes the time to define what a headband is and then goes into detail explaining that the headband must be either the dominant color in the uniform or a neutral color and that it must be the same for every person on the team.

So whether a girl chooses to tie a piece of pre-wrap around her head or don a sweat band a-la Kayla Hatting and Emily Anderson, it must be the same color for all the girls on the team.

But if the entire volleyball team wants to make chicken feathers (definition: various pieces of ribbon tied on a hair tie to form a feathery look) in colors that are nowhere close to the school colors or those in the uniform, that is completely reasonable.

Any hair scrunchy - although as far as I can tell, scrunchies took a serious hit in the fashion world after 1996 - can be worn as well. In fact, a team could create a rainbow effect with each girl wearing a different colored scrunchy and they would not be violating a rule.

But if they wanted to attempt the same rainbow effect with their pre-wrap or sweat bands, they would be strictly reprimanded.

Seriously, who comes up with this stuff?

Maybe I should get a job with the IGHSAU - make a comfortable salary and come up with ridiculous rules for high school girls to follow from season to season.

Probably the first rule I would implement would involve shoelaces. Maybe I will require that all shoelaces must match the main color of the headband and if a hair piece is not adorned, shoelaces should be omitted as well.

Sounds like the perfect amount of ridiculousness. (Yes, that is a real word - spell check did not correct me!)

But with the release of the preseason volleyball memo, all my hairstyle rage is really a moot point.

Yes, the IGHSAU has finally realized that hair adornments are not the biggest concern when it comes to playing the game.

Based on another rule adaptation I read Monday, their next issue might be dealing with girls kicking the volleyball around during match play this fall.

"9-4-5: A legal contact is a touch of the ball by any part of the player's body. This will assist in keeping the ball in play and provide longer and more exciting rallies."

Because what would make a volleyball match more exciting than testing the girls' soccer skills?

But I digress.

I'll just say, congratulations IGHSAU. You have righted a wrong and can now be taken about as seriously as the United Nations.