My grandma, my hero

My grandma proved this to me.

For instance, when she was given sperm, she created a baby (four of them to be exact). When she was given a house, she created a home. When she was given groceries, she created a meal. When you gave her a smile, she gave you her heart.

She always multiplied and enlarged whatever was given to her.

My family knew this. I knew this. But there was one lesson we still hadn't learned, and it all started when grandma got a computer.

"Grandma, that's not how you type," I said as she continued to chicken-peck the keyboard with her fingers. Yet, one by one, she hit the keys using only the pointer finger of each hand. "Grandma, let me type out the e-mail. It will save some time."

"Have some patience," she said.

"Patients are for hospitals grandma," I said.

"Patience is a virtue," she said.

"Ability and skill are also a virtues, grandma, and both of which I have when it comes to typing so I could help you," I said.

Then she proceeded to open up Internet Explorer and went to Wikipedia.com.

"Well, Wikipedia lists 123 examples of virtues. You may have ability and skill, but you're lacking 121 other virtues."

"How'd you know about Wikipedia grandma?" I asked in shock.

"I was looking up the 'annoyance' a few days ago and your name popped up as the Wikipedia definition," she said with a grin.

At that moment I learned that if you gave grandma any crap, she would give you a ton in return.

She is truly my hero.