Loving them

Remember they cared for you when you couldn't care for yourself

But this time I didn't have an answer or solution.

Life just seems to get even more complicated. As a result of being in a relationship with someone who has an elderly parent, I think I am being put to a new kind of challenge.

My parents are in their early sixties, doing very well and having the empty nest time of their life.

I haven't had to care for them except for getting them water and pills or chasing them through the vet's hospital in Sioux Falls in their wheelchair, not catching them, and piling on the floor left in the dust.

That would be dad.

But now something new has arisen.

Asked of me...."What do you think we should do?" I had no answer.

Let's say your parent is very independent. Lives on their own and drives their own car. They go to doctors appointments, take friends on their errands.

Suddenly because of a choice one of your children has made, you are stripped of your car and told you can't ever have another one.

Following this other decisions are being made for her life, possibly throwing out all of her stuff, selling off her house, and moving her to a new town to be closer to one of her children, and maybe not the one that she wants to be closer to.

Who knows, no one really asks her.

My question for you, is how do you decide, when is the time, do you wait for them to get hurt, or need hospitalization before you take over. Why can't you just work with the parent, help them make decisions, see what they want.

Oh that's right I remember, out of sight out of mind.

They have been stuck at least an hour away from everyone, out of everyone's hair, and now instead of caring, you just find the quick fix to get them out of your hair again. So then they will next be out of sight out of mind.

What happens when they die? Do you cry a bit at the funeral and then bury them....

out of sight? out of mind?

Angel out......